Tag
friends
link1
Sunita,
*Jun Rui,
Safary,
Sabrina,
Jesvin,
Khairul,
Wan Yi,
Kai Boon,
Ahmad,
Jek Yew,
Darius,
Kee Seng(Lex),
Shawn,
Gilbert,
Li Qin,
Arsenal(gunnerblog)!
recent
This post is not one of my usual posts. It is mean...
Tonight the music seems so loudI wish that we coul...
I'm not going to make anymore excuses for myself. ...
Every day I wake up and it's SundayWhatever's in m...
Everytime that I look in the mirrorAll these lines...
Has he lost his mind?Can he see or is he blind?Wil...
Take the time to make some senseof what you want t...
I don't know what's worth fighting forOr why I hav...
My hands are tied My mind is blankMy body bruisedN...
See the stone set in your eyes See the thorn twist...
past
May 2005
June 2005
July 2005
August 2005
September 2005
October 2005
November 2005
December 2005
January 2006
February 2006
March 2006
April 2006
May 2006
June 2006
July 2006
August 2006
September 2006
October 2006
November 2006
December 2006
January 2007
February 2007
credits
about me
Name: Noah
nickname: Crucifer
Age: 17
From: Singapore
Faves
Music-->Music with heavy rock influences
Books-->Lotr,harry potter,death note,Rave
Tv shows-->Comedies mostly
Game-->Warcraft 3(dota),Command and Conquer
Sport-->Soccer(midfielder)
Color-->Plain classic black
Horoscope-->Scorpio
Explanation
People keep on asking me what my blog address stands for. I have written in a previous entry what this blog address means but as it'll take a long time to locate it, I'll just give a brief explanation here.
Everyone has a dark side, everyone has a good side to them. No one is completely evil nor perfect. So I have characterised this 2 sides of my as crucifer being my dark side and ntljr as my good side. I can't explain how the name Crucifer came about,but its definitely not because of the superband band lucify. Crucifer was a nickname I had for myself for a long time before that. Ntljr basically stands for what every postive feeling, every postitive emotion and quality I have running through me. I have always looked towards "ntljr" as a source of inspiration, and no matter how down I am, I will cling on to that last bit of humanity and hope of "ntljr". This is hard to explain and I doubt anyone will understand as its a matter of emotions and feelings. What ntljr stands for is obvious to but a few, but suffice it to say that it'll always mean something to me. Always.
Sunday, January 29, 2006
Happy Chinese New Year!
wings tear my body apart at [11:56 AM]
Thursday, January 26, 2006
I'm totally drunk right now.......just drank brandy.....first time trying it,not bad,much better than beer but somehow wine taste better........brandy i think just too strong man,i feel so dizzy now......hahahahaha YEEEAAAHHH!!! Ok,anyway i'm so bloody relived econs project is finally over,ews web based report is done,only left with the presentation,only left with the ews ICA3 project. Econs presentation went ok,not too bad,got tongue tied at one moment but managed to cover it......was supposed to go east coast cycling today but i couldn't as my mum suddenly decided to cook and I had to stay and eat......sad man,I didn't expect this,was looking foward to the relaxing cycling trip.......Ended up watching Memoirs of a Geisha with my cousin and his frens......a impromptu decision as the invitation was last minute.....wasn't too bad the movie but I was too sleepy to enjoy it,somemore halfway through the movie my mind was occupied with something else that happened suddenly....won't elaborate further.....haha,I don't know what to do man......my heart is no longer mine to give away........oh well,i'll guess i will eventually figure something out..........chinese new year is around the corner,will be expecting angpows left right centre.......this year CNY good timing,I'm in need of cash and the cash would come in REALLY handy IF(and only IF) I should have anything planned on Valentine's day which is coming soon.......
wings tear my body apart at [11:21 PM]
Wednesday, January 25, 2006
'Cause Little by little
wings tear my body apart at [10:48 AM]
Monday, January 23, 2006
A person scarred by the sins and the pains of his life, learns much faster than a person who's life is perfect. I've learnt to not hope,to not dream, not to believe in anything.......or anyone. The world is too unpredictable,too cruel for useless things like that. Trust,love and friendship are all just like dust in the wind........easily destroyed and quite impossible to last in one place forever. So why do I still live my life based on these? I've been hurt over and over and OVER again,in different ways and by different people.....you would think I'd have learnt my lesson by now......But I believe I've been hurt so many times that I'm right now addicted and used to it. I've gotten used to the feeling of waking up and having a sinking feeling about the day ahead of me......in fact,I don't really have a reason to wake up in the morning.......I thought I recently found the reason but I don't really think there ever was one......Don't think there ever will be one........I'm a loner....I'll be alone in soul and in spirit.......I doubt I'll ever find someone to share my soul with,my problems,my thoughts........I hate raising my hopes that the someone has been found before dashing it so cruelly and so quickly........but this feeling of hate is a feeling which I embrace....its the only feeling I trust.....the only feeling I should feel......
wings tear my body apart at [7:54 PM]
Saturday, January 21, 2006
Ohhhh.......man........yesterday was the nyp open house and being the goodie bag distributor was really a bloody boring job. In the first shift all I had to do was to wait for the supply of goodie bags to run low before getting more. It took very long for the supply to run low as morning wasn't really crowded. So ended up talking with lex about a lot of things.....in the end got so bored as there really was nothing to do and since there was no supervision,we went outside to accompany Wan Yi in her ushering job.....so slacked the first shift away,met william and his gf for lunch at north canteen but I didn't eat anything as I was too full from breakfast which I just ate 3hours ago. The slacking supervision were such that lex,Jek,Wan Yi and I could all take our break together....though Wan Yi didn't eat lunch with us....hahaha,dun worry,I'm not in the least bit jealous......so mr tan kee seng, you can stop announcing to the world that I am....2 shift was way better,because of lack of manpower I was shifted to data entry and it was at that position when I saw this extremely BEAUTIFUL and PRETTY girl!! Wa lao,she really outstanding in the looks department man....and I'm someone who is very reserved with praise but this girl.....deserves all my repertoire of of praise in terms of the looks. Hahaha,incredible that such beauty exists in the small island of Singapore man.....this is the only girl I can say can match shuanna in beauty or even better her.......but of course I didn't ask her for her number or anything,I don't do things like that as I believe in character rather than beauty....and I respect a person's privacy. Ya,to me,relationships should be formed from the inside rather than the outside though I know many people who get into relationships just because of the outside beauty. Anyway,after the open house,had to help darius the fool with his part of the economics project and it was then when I saw someone whom I never expected in my life to be so suay as to see again and when I saw him it really got me boiling and I was seriously tempted to go and punch his fucking face and beat him up all over again......strong words from me considering I'm such a man of peace ;P....really spoilt my day and my mood.....however,I still managed to be happy when I attended cousing Geraldine's wedding later that night. The table seating had problems and my parents and I and a few other relatives were left without a table even after the dinner had started.....eventually they opened up a new table.....food wasn't too bad,I was surprisingly full after the dinner was over even though the helpings were small....wah,realised that my cousin Geraldine who's 27 this year and her husband Heng Tong were in a relationship for more than 11 years!!! What a remarkable achievement......so Wan Yi,you can start believing again that relationships can so long till marriage and even after that.....the key is to put in effort to make the relationship surprising,romantic and fresh all the time. Haha,got a bit drunk drinking too much wine and I'm now suffering from a hangover damn it....oh well,thats about all,pretty long entry.......
wings tear my body apart at [12:51 PM]
Wednesday, January 18, 2006
This is the result from a personality test i took
wings tear my body apart at [8:52 PM]
Yesterday was turbulent,totally drained, really unbearable.............emotions can be so very sweet....and so very destructive......
wings tear my body apart at [3:57 PM]
Tuesday, January 17, 2006
You don't want to lose me later
wings tear my body apart at [8:35 PM]
Friday, January 13, 2006
It never rains but it only pours.......
wings tear my body apart at [1:40 AM]
Wednesday, January 11, 2006
Last night, while chatting with Wan Yi on Msn, something was triggered within me and I was filled with great regret suddenly. It was so overwhelming, so powerful.....I couldn't breathe, couldn't do anything but sit there and stare blankly into space.......
wings tear my body apart at [12:10 AM]
Friday, January 06, 2006
wings tear my body apart at [1:39 PM]